i just want perfect skin and hair and teeth and body proportions and endless supplies of money and beauty and intelligence. is that too much to ask for?
7/1/14 (via phyxiated)
I JUST PUT MY SHIRT ON AND THERE WAS A SPIDER IN IT!!!!!!!!
or did you just put a shirt on that a spider was already wearing?
thats so rude
god dammit i fell off the bus with my groceries when i was getting out and my bag broke and the bus ran over my lettuce fml my life
fml = fuck my lettuce
YOU KEEP YOUR GENITALS AWAY FROM MY DEAD LETTUCE